Buy my comics, rake me over the coals: CATWOMAN #59

And to think I thought everyone had pretty much guessed at this point who the baby's daddy was. I honestly didn't think it would be such a controversial reveal. Shows you what I know -- at least last week's post got a decent response. (It was even bigger than the response to my post about Jerry Lewis' public meltdown last fall.)

In case anyone's wondering why I didn't respond after the first couple messages, it's because my own actual flesh-and-blood daughter wasn't feeling well and needed some extra attention. (She had this, in case you're wondering.) Real baby trumps fictional baby every time. Sorry.

I guess I'm still surprised so many people thought it was going to be Batman. I mean, from this scene way back in the first post Year One issue, I thought I was making it obvious it wasn't Bruce Wayne. Speaking as a father -- and as a guy who knows a lot of fathers -- this is not how a father would act, buying off the mom with a teddy bear and a college scholarship. If Bruce had been the dad and tried to appease Selina with this stunt, she would've clawed his eyes out, protective lenses in the Bat mask or not. This is Batman giving a friend support, not Batman trying to weasel out of child support.

Plus, Batman is the most overly prepared guy in the DCU. Do you really think someone who went to all the trouble of formulating insanely complex plans to take down his JLA buddies on the million-to-one chance he'd need them wouldn't take much simpler precautions in other (i.e. romantic) situations? Are we talking about the same guy?

If the Sam Revelation (as historians will now call it) made you drop the book, sorry to see you go. But if you're willing to stick around, I promise plenty of thrills and chills in the upcoming months (c'mon -- aren't there any movie fans out there with an opinion on Film Freak?) and a few twists and turns in just how Sam and Selina made that baby. Well, of course, we all know how they made the baby, but the scene of them getting romantic in CATWOMAN 59 didn't necessary lead to lil' Helena. There's more in store for those two, and the stakes get much, much higher. And, as some of the posters said in the comments thread, life -- especially when it involves S-E-X -- can get very complicated. Things don't always go as planned.

As always, feel free to share you comments here. I'm not asking you to agree, but I am requesting you keep any references to cups of urine to an absolute minimum.

Buy my comics, make me rich: CATWOMAN #59

Yes, gang, here it is at long last, the issue that reveals once and for all who the father of Catwoman's cute lil' baby is ...

Is it Superman? Jonah Hex? Martian Manhunter? Plastic Man? Elongated Man? The Flash? (Pick any version!) Prez? Kamandi? Bwana Beast? Brother Power the Geek? One of four of The Inferior Five? Flex Mentallo? Charles Atlas? "Mac"? Bizarro? (Me think so!) Dr. Manhattan? Ozymandias? The Comedian? Nite Owl? Night Wing? Robin? (Again, pick any version!) Batman? All-Star Batman? Batman of Earth Two? Batman the Dark Knight? Batman the Dark Knight Returns? Batman the Dark Knight Strikes Back? Bat Baby? Ace the Bat Hound? Man Bat? Man-Thing? Swamp Thing? The Thing? Thing from "The Addams Family"? (No, wait, that's probably impossible.) Or could it be the ever-popular "None of the Above"?

Buy CATWOMAN 59 and find out! As always, any comments, criticisms or questions are welcome right here in this space. Or, if you'd like to share the story of how this issue caused you to lose all hope in comics, stop by here. I'm sure you'll be welcomed with open arms!

By the way, if you do happen to be in your local comics shop tomorrow and you're lucky enough to see a copy of the book IN THE STUDIO on the shelves, be sure to scrape together $29.95 and buy it. I haven't seen the actual volume myself yet, but I did read the features when they originally appeared in (the also highly recommended) COMIC ART magazine and they're some of the most revealing interviews with comic creators I've ever seen. This book (by Todd Hignite) has talks with Dan Clowes, Chris Ware, Ivan Brunetti, Seth, Jaime Hernandez and several others, complete with photos of their sketchbooks, working processes and artwork that inspired them. They've been expanded for this volume, and there are a number of folks who were never interviewed in COMIC ART, so this should be some book. Heck, the photos of Seth's homemade cardboard cities and handmade hardbound books alone are worth the price of admission.

If you've lost all hope in comics, this is the sort of book that can bring it right back.

Not live! From a fake soundstage in California!

I'm not going to have too much spare time this fall to watch TV, but the one new show I am interested in debuts Monday. It's STUDIO 60 ON THE SUNSET STRIP, the hour-long NBC drama from Aaron Sorkin that focuses on a SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE-type show. I'm really jazzed about STUDIO 60, though I wasn't a huge fan of Sorkin's WEST WING and never even watched his other TV show about a TV show, SPORTS NIGHT. But for some reason, I'm excited about STUDIO 60. Seems like the right combination of workplace drama (which I usually enjoy) and shows that take place mostly at night (which, for some reason, I also usually enjoy). Besides, I've thought the real SNL has been awful for the past few years, and this show looks like it's going to make the most of that premise.

Bradley Whitford and Matthew Perry as the producers of the late-night comedy show within a show on "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip." Guess which one has the drug problem. Wrong!

I'm even more excitied now that I've actually seen the pilot. Though it doesn't debut until Monday, Sept 18, you can watch the entire first episode now, thanks to the magic of cyberspace. Go here, choose your connection speed and set aside about 46 minutes. I think you'll be glad you did. (And, in case you'd like to read it, the pilot's script can be found here.)

I liked just about everything about STUDIO 60. The opening, which sets up the entire premise, is beautifully timed and, though it's a tad too pleased with itself, it's still a helluva way to kick off a series. The cast seems uniformly strong, from Matthew Perry (thankfully not channeling Chandler Bing) and Bradley Whitford as the new producers through Amanda Peet as the West Coast chief of NBC, er, NBS, and Steven Weber at her asshole boss, right over to Sarah Paulson, D.L. Hughley and Nate Cordry as the cast members. You even get cameos from Ed Asner and Judd Hirsch (who stars in that bracing opening segment). Plus, 360 Mafia! What more could you want in an hour-long drama?

Best of all, it's a smart, well-written, well-performed show that seems to treat its viewers as being intelligent too. (A Paddy Chayefsky reference? Thanks!) It moves smoothly (some more of that patented WEST WING walking-while-talking choreography) and might even have something to say.

In other words, tune in while you can. It'll probably be cancelled in three weeks to make room for more DEAL OR NO DEAL.

Get back to work or face the wrath of management!

Those fake motivational posters are all over the Web (so much so, in fact, that you'd have to be completely irony impaired to actually hang a real motivational poster on your office wall), but the folks at Something Awful.com have come up with a semi-funny selection of super villain motivational posters. Here are my two faves:

The Red Skull one is fun, thanks in no small part to the great maniacal portrait by Jack Kirby himself, but the Magneto one is even better, mostly due to its foulmouthed simplicity.

Now quit screwing around on the Internet! There's work to be done, god dammit! Those executive bonuses aren't going to earn themselves!

OK, that's two down...

Two years ago today, I got this blog of mine up and running. Since then, it's been a self-indulgent mix of comics talk, movie reviews, pop cult nonsense and, of course, coverage of Jerry Lewis' public meltdown (still my most popular post by a wide, wide margin.) I've had a lot of fun emptying my brain into this corner of cyberspace, and if I haven't been posting as often as I used to lately, be assured it's not because I don't have anything to say. As I warned way back in January, my adorable lil' daughter has left me less time for mindless pursuits like blogging, sleeping and bathing.

Nothing special to say today about hitting the big 0-2, so instead I'll just recommend a comic that hits the stands tomorrow. MUSCLEBOUND, the fourth collection of Grant Morrison's DOOM PATROL is finally being released by DC/Vertigo, and it's definitely worth a place on your shelf. Besides the usual surreal hijinx (the Pentagon becomes a circle, the violent Beard Hunter stalks the Chief and we learn why the color green is important) this is the set of stories that features the debut of Flex Mentallo, star of my favorite mini-series of all time.

I thought DC couldn't reprint his stories because of a lawsuit from the Charles Atlas people (he and Flex have just about the same origin), but apparently that's not the case. With any luck, we'll soon get a collection of the four-issue FLEX series and the rest of you can see what the big deal is.

Because if what happens really happened -- and crazy ol' Grant makes you half believe that it did -- it's a very big deal indeed.

Five years left to cry in

We all know what happened five years ago today. What's even more important is what's happened since then. I don't want to get into a big discussion about the post 9/11 world ( I think it's pretty obvious where I stand on the political spectrum), but on this anniversary of those events, take a moment to remember what it was like back in September of 2001. Not just the strange horror of seeing that footage over and over, or the uneasy feeling that this must be some sort of terrible dream, but the other feelings that hit, in the days and weeks that followed.

Remember how everyone seemed a bit closer? How you'd say hi to people on the street you never even met, just because it felt like a good thing to do. Remember how that scenario played out on a global level? How even the liberal French (two groups hated now by many, for some reason) newspaper Le Monde ran an editorial under the headline "We Are All Americans?" How Jon Stewart, normally a wise-cracking comedian, spoke plainly and eloquently about the tragedy and its aftermath?



Now look at the world around you. The countries that we've alienated. The fellow Americans we've alienated. The president who lied to get us into a war that distracted us from fighting terrorists and made the world a more dangerous place, not a safer one. The voters who re-elected him because he's the sort of guy we need to stand up to them terrorists. The soldiers who are dying in the Middle East, and the thousands more who are going to follow them.

That, my friends, is the real legacy of 9/11. And five years from now, it's still going to be with us.

Buy his comic, make him rich: RENFIELD

My old friend Galen Showman has reworked RENFIELD, a graphic novel he drew for Caliber back in the go-go '90s. Galen has done some fine work in this field, including some collaborations with P. Craig Russell, and he drew the beautifully retro two-part series JLA: AGE OF WONDER a few years back. I've known Galen for years and was wondering what he's been up to. Well, wonder no more...

Galen's a very talented artist, and one of the most meticulous guys I know. This RENFIELD is sure to be worth picking up. It ships in November from Image, and is in the brand-new Previews Catalog -- so start bugging your retailer now!

Here's an interview with Galen, and here's a preview of the book. By the way, if you ever run into Galen at a convention, buy the man a beer and ask him about movies. I guarantee the resulting conversation will be worth the price of the beer, no matter how expensive it was.